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Top 3 Techniques to Handle Difficult Emotions

san jose, counseling, chris jones, emotionsTop 3 Techniques to Handle Difficult Emotions

One of the most difficult things that we have to overcome before we can heal from challenging emotions is how much our thoughts can dominate us.

Even though it is easy to become used to the idea that our thoughts rule us, in reality, we should try to have our feelings take power over the thousands of thoughts running through our heads every day. Being in this “feeling-state” can make changing the way you feel on a daily basis much easier.

Our emotions are the underlying root to all the thoughts that we think, and people are always saying, “Get to the root of the problem,” so why do we not do this with our minds as well? If you are incredibly angry, your thoughts will reflect that, and once you calm down, your thoughts will be calmer as well.

These techniques can be used any time to make ourselves feel different, and they are the ones that I believe to be some of the most powerful.

1. Feel the feeling, completely.

This is a very counter-intuitive action to take when you want to feel differently, but embracing an uncomfortable feeling instead of pushing it away will help you to make peace with it. So, take the negative feeling, be it anger, jealousy, fear, anxiety, or anything, and allow it to be there fully. Take a deep breath in, and try to take the feeling from the center of your body up towards the top of your head, and be mindful of the difference in the way that you feel. On your exhale, release the negative feeling. Repeat as many times as you feel necessary.

2. Be grateful for the negative feeling.

After you take the negative feeling (or feelings) and recognize them, you need to thank them. You may not feel that these feelings deserve any thanks, but they teach you something every time they arise within you. Doing this with negative feelings will almost always immediately lessen them, make them easier to deal with and process.

3. A quiet mind is a powerful thing.

Even though it is an incredibly rare moment when our minds are truly quiet – when the roar of everyday life lulls for a moment or two, it is worth cherishing. This particular technique does not have to be practiced in a quiet space, you can do it anywhere. When a difficult thought comes up, simply say to it “Silence.” Keep doing this over and over again, and the thought will begin to become quieter and eventually fade away.

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